How to get a foreign boyfriend if you’re in SE Asia
Tip 0: You must learn English and learn it well!
I didn’t think I needed to put this in here but it seems I do. If you’re not willing to learn English and learn it well don’t bother reading the rest of this article. Think about it. Would you prefer to date someone that can communicate with you well or just barely?
Tip 1: It doesn’t matter if you are handsome or not!
“Why do foreigners always get the ugliest Asians?’ That’s a question I hear a lot and it has a few answers. One because standards of beauty differ but two and more importantly because of the attitude. I discovered pretty quickly after arriving here that the ‘ugly’ guys just had an overall better attitude disposition. They tended to be more helpful and willing to do what it takes to satisfy their man and I don’t just mean in the bedroom either.
Handsome guys, I found, almost expected me to cater to them even though they were the ones that approached me. I have literally received messages from handsome boys offering to let me give them a massage! LOL! If you are handsome simply being willing to be seen with him and spread your legs in the hotel room isn’t enough to get and keep a foreign man. Very few foreign men will put up with a bad attitude for long just because the boy is handsome
Tip 2: Be helpful
This is so important and yet I don’t see enough guys doing it. Most foreign men come here alone. We all know how many people here are waiting to take advantage if they can. A very quick and easy way to get to a foreigner’s heart is to be helpful. There are several ways to be helpful:
Help him to find a place to live that is safe and a fair price.
Before he even arrives make sure he’s getting a good price for his hotel. Ask him what he wants to do and what part of town he is staying in and advise him. Essentially become his travel agent.
Fetch him at the airport. If that means missing work then that’s what it means.
Have a home cooked meal prepared for him when he arrives if you can.
If he sees that you’re willing to go the extra mile for him you’ll have an advantage over your competition. Also if you present it the right way he will most likely reimburse your lost wages/expenses just don’t come with the mindset that you expect that to happen.
Tip 3: Don’t ask for money
The Gay Expat is not a site for people looking for just a sugar daddy, an escort, or prostitute. If you ask for money right away you’ll just cause him to raise his guard and never trust you.
There’s even a good chance that once you guys have sex you’ll never hear from him again. Yikes!!
I don’t recommend you ask for money at all frankly. After you’ve established a relationship of trust and he’s comfortable with you then you can let him know something you may need help on and then let him decide if he wants to help or not. Don’t push it. If you’re looking to just be an escort in exchange for money that’s fine too as long as both parties know what it is.
Tip 4: Don’t play games when it comes to sex
If you’re going to date a foreign guy expect him to want sex pretty quickly. The culture is different. Playing silly games and pretending to be a virgin isn’t cute and won’t earn you any points. It’ll just make you seem immature, untrustworthy, and not worth his time. I’m not saying you’re obligated to put out on the first, second, or third date but if its obvious you’re just trying to play hard to get you’ll get passed over pretty quickly. I can’t tell you how many guys I’ve passed on because they tried to tell me they are 29 year old virgins. Most foreigners won’t care how many guys you’ve been with in the past.
Tip 5: Be a bottom or at least versatile
Look, the average penis size in the SE Asia is 3.5-5 inches. Contrast that with America and Europe where the average dick size is roughly 6 inches. Also, rightfully or wrongfully, most Americans associate Asians with bottoms. If you have a 3.5 incher and a pure top. I recommend a size enhancement gel. Just a quick aside to my black readers understand that your bottom is used to dicks around 3.5-5 inches. Keep that in mind when you penetrate him for the first time.
Tip 6: Avoid abusive foreigners
While there are plenty of scammers here waiting to scam foreigners, sadly, there is a minority of foreigners that are abusive to their Asian spouses. You don’t want that trust me. I know the allure of going to America is strong but I’ve heard stories of Asian guys committing suicide because of abuse.
You can protect yourself by being a person of integrity. If all you’re looking for is a sugar daddy then expect to have a domineering and controlling partner. That’s the only reason most men are willing to be sugar daddies. In addition there are other things to look out for:
Claiming love too quickly, quick to anger, promising to take you back to his home country right away, constantly bringing up how much money he’s spending on you, not respecting your sexual boundaries.
You’re not his play toy. If he doesn’t respect you enough to back-off when you tell him 5 times you’re not in the mood or you’re still in pain from the last time then what makes you think he’ll respect you more in the future?
Tip 7: Buy him a gift
It needn’t be an expensive gift. There are many places you can find a gift. Lazada.com has a large selection of gifts that will appeal to westerners. It will show him you are serious. Remember the name of the game is to stand out from your competition. I realize the culture is for the foreigner to always pay but showing him that you have skin in the game will mean a big deal to him!
Last But not Least Be Genuine
I’ve seen many happy asian/foreign relationships in Thailand, Cambodia, and the Philippines. In the truly loving ones I see one common theme. No one is using the other. The asian guy is not just looking for money and the foreigner is not just looking for a young sex object. I hope my words are helpful to you! Good luck in your search for a foreign lover!