Are you tired of spending your holidays by yourself? Then it’s time to do something about it. Sorry Sam, The Weather Girls were wrong, it doesn’t rain men. If you want a good partner then you’ll have to go out and get one. That’s why I wrote this article to help you get a guy of good moral character to be your long term partner and who knows, your spouse 😉
How to Make a Gay Guy Interested in You
If you want to get guys to like you try these things.
- See what types of guys he likes
- Find out what his interests are
- Invite him to social events with you
- Be helpful
See What He Likes
When I was single and saw a guy that suited my fancy I would start a conversation with him and ask him what types of guys he likes. You can read my article on how to break the ice with open-ended questions. If you are interested in a guy then you should first check out what types of guys he’s into to see if you have a shot. But don’t give up if he doesn’t describe you exactly. If he doesn’t describe you I say you can still keep trying to see if he may be interested down the road.
Find Out What He’s Interested In
There are four pillars to a successful relationship. 1. Mutual respect 2. Common Interests 3. Similar moral values 4. Compatible life objectives. If you want to get a guy interested in you then you need to see what he’s interested in. You can do this by observing him and listen to what he talks about. If online you can simply ask him what he’s into. Then you research those things and viola! You have something to talk about with him.
Try to Be Interesting
Far too often I see guys just posting pictures with their shirt off hoping to attract a good guy. BORING! Will a shirtless picture attract a guy? Sure. But if you want to attract a good guy you need to show something that is unique and interesting about you. Just a friendly tip, most guys who plaster their profiles with semi-nude photos of themselves online are just looking for attention, sex, or money, not love
Invite Him To Social Events
When I was single I would invite a guy I liked to church or a basketball game with me. The point is it was something fun but didn’t trip any creepy vibes because it was a public venue. Finding excuses to spend time with a guy is a great way to observe and get to know him more.
A Zero is Better Than a Negative
Desperation is never attractive and people are just naturally more attracted to guys that don’t need them. That’s why you notice whenever you’re in a relationship people start coming out of the woodwork declaring that they like you. If you send a guy messages begging for a relationship he won’t respect you, at best, and, at worse, he may take advantage of you. When it comes to relationships always remember a zero is better than a negative.
Yes, it’s okay to say you are looking for a long term relationship, in fact, I encourage it, but you should also add ‘with the right guy for me’. So instead of saying “I’m looking for an LTR”, when he asks what you are looking for you can say, “I’m looking for an LTR with the right person.”
Positivity is What You Need!
Be positive! Please don’t spend your conversations complaining about how your ex treated you or how everyone you’ve talked to asks you for money or nude pictures. Trust me, nobody wants to hear that and you’ll just come off as some bitter, desperate queen. Most of the time the only guys that will stick around after listening to you drone on about your ex will be the guys who just want something from you. When you are talking to a guy try to stay positive, he’s not your therapist. Remember, the purpose of the first few conversations is to find things that you have in common and to find out if he shares your values and objectives in life.
Confidence is Key!
Be confident. Most guys are attracted to guys who are confident. Even if you don’t have big muscles or a big something else, you can still be attractive in his eyes if you are confident about yourself. Oh, and it’s a huge turn off when you complain about your physical features fishing for compliments. The best way to be confident is to focus on your strengths instead of your shortcomings. Maybe you’re intelligent and a hard-working guy. Focus on that instead of your physical attributes. You can also go to niche sites and apps that fit you. Check out my article on best gay dating apps/sites for guys who are serious. I strongly recommend mature and larger men try out Compatible Partners. It’s free to see your matches and is an oasis in the desert of mainstream gay culture.
When I first met my husband he was complaining to me that the AC in his car was making a funny noise and the mechanic wanted $800 to fix it. I offered to take a look at it and found that it was simply the compressor belt that was loose. I tightened it and the noise stopped. After I finished, he smiled and asked if I wanted to go to Jack’s with him. I said yes and the rest is history.
Wanna know why the bosses fall in love with their secretary’s so often? Because the secretary is so helpful she becomes an essential part of his life. She schedules his meetings, screens out B2B salesmen, follows up on appointments, etc etc. We humans can’t help but grow fond of those who help us. If you want to win a guy’s heart then being helpful is one of the best ways to do it.
Check Your Expectations
We all want the best guy we can get and there’s nothing wrong with that, but, it’s important that we keep our expectations in line with what we have to offer. I see far too many gay men who are simply way too picky and are frustrated because they’re still single. Clearly, I’m not suggesting you go out with a guy who makes you grimace when you look at him or a loser that doesn’t have a job or any means of supporting himself. I am suggesting you take a long quiet time to reflect on what you are expecting your future partner to be and what you have to offer in exchange. Only you can decide what you’re willing to be flexible on and what you must have.
Finding a guy isn’t rocket science. Too many gay men make getting a date far more complicated than it has to be. If you are single and don’t want to be then you should just put yourself out there and meet people. Every dud will get you one step closer to that date that may turn into your future husband.